Best things in life

”The best things in life are free…”

That is the first part of a quote by the famous French designer, Coco Chanel. Only things I know about her is she has a perfume, her purses look like puffer jackets, and Ridley Scott’s legendary commercial (called the greatest 30 sec in visual arts).

Here is the rest of her quote:

“…The second best things are very, very expensive.”

Coco has really embraced the second part.

Zoom in to the sign. “Bursa” means purse, “scarpe” means shoes. You can do the Euro (€) to US dollar ($) conversion.

There are things you have to pay an entrance fee. Colosseum. Vatican Museums. Pantheon. Art galleries.

However, the biggest attraction of Rome is the central city itself. It is an outdoor archaeological museum. There are ruins everywhere.

It is the exotic mess—ha, that was autocorrect; keeping it. Meant the exoticness. There will be things that are novel and interesting. Then, there will be times you will wonder how can anyone do things this way?!

Plus, Italy has Italians. All kinds. However, there will be patterns that become apparent after a few days in Rome. 

Stylish Italians with conspicuously more panache in how they present themselves. Talking loud, laughing louder; moving through spaces in a way that shows security of their place.

You’re a guest. They live and make the Eternal City hum. Men in suits and women in dresses zipping by on scooters. Nuns and clerics moving in packs.

Customs that reflect a slower way of life—especially with meals. Standard procedures for ordering meals. Gelato is paid first. Traditional eateries with mid-afternoon shutdown for about 4 hours. Discovering that just olive oil and salt brings a lot of flavor. When the simplest ingredients bring a sophisticated experience, you understand why there is an overall pride in their food culture.

Stone walkways. Trendiest fashions and home furnishings in the oldest buildings. 

Traffic that weaves through corners and roundabouts. Cars, themselves, are a curiosity. First one is only a single seater. 

Before this post can just be dismissed as an American tourist smug in discovering that Italians really value what is important…let me take this in a different direction. 

Look at the photos below. You don’t need to read Italian to know what it commemorates. The dates are the biggest clue.

Pickpockets & other Roman classics

Antipasto is how it begins…

My wonderful wife anticipating the quintessential Roman dish, cacio e pepe.

What do you get with a lot of disoriented, distracted tourists in crowded locations? Pickpockets, scam artists, trinket peddlers. The latter 2 are a mild nuisance. The first?

If you think about the sociological implications of a traditionally marginalized ethnic group, you might have sympathy.

If you consider the structural economic challenges, you might be able to weigh in on an academic discussion.

Intellectual sparring in the university faculty halls have covered those topics, I’m sure.

Just think of the vicious jousting here is savage as any gladiatorial combat.

Now, if that actually happens to you…you’ll want to impose ancient Roman justice. I don’t know too many folks that can enjoy their holiday abroad when their wallet or handbag is taken.

Since the light-fingered larceny may not just be the loss of your cash, but credit cards, identification, passport, mobile phone, and medication, you may not be impartial. 

That is why these intrepid travelers use chest bags (I did tighten Sandra’s, Andrea’s mom, bag eventually).

Now with that public service announcement behind us, I can balance it with the better side of the locals.

For example, the patient hydraulic engineer (grey pants) and caribiniere (dark uniform with red stripe) I met in the laundromat were more than courteous with my clueless self. They showed me that the soap is added automatically. Plus, they showed me how to enter the machine number in the central payment panel because there is no vending per machine.

As I told Andrea’s sisters, laundromats exist all over European cities—even in the family friendly districts. (In the US suburbs, we just see a lot of them by ethnic grocery stores and payday lenders.) Most folks have washing machines in their apartments. Dryers are not as common. In either case, what is at home is typically not large enough for bulky items.

All that is to say there will be an interesting mix of folks at the laundromat. I was the only tourist during the hour I was there. (Yes, I asked.) So don’t overpack by bringing unique clothes for every day. Who knows who you’ll meet on laundry day?

Speaking of cultural intersection, ever been to “typical American” cuisine joints in another country?

Do you know what is not classical Italian cuisine? Spaghetti and meatballs. Yes, Italians eat spaghetti. Yes, they also eat meatballs. But a single dish that combines both? Fuggadaboutit.

Remember, also, Italian cuisine goes way beyond the sacrilegious Chef Boyardee and frozen white cardboard discs sprayed with ketchup and cheese-like flakes. 

The following are authentic dishes. (Note: regional Italian tastes vary widely and can be exotic. Not kidding; click the “exotic” link and see the first. I know what most folks can handle.) Click the names to learn about them.

Arancini, suppli

Cacio e pepe

Bisteca fiorentina

Ragù alla bolognese

Panini

Osso buco

Brodetto

Coda alla vaccinara

Pizza Napoletana

Spaghetti carbonara

Risotto

Carciofo alla giudia

L’amatriciana

Gelato

One volcanic eruption can ruin your day

Pompeii. One word is all you need to say and everyone knows what you are talking about. 

(But there is another town not as well known. That village was Herculaneum. It, too, was buried under volcanic ash and pumice in the Eruption of Mount Vesuvius in 79 AD. However, it’s kind of a mouthful to say.)

But we’ll get to that when we get there. And getting there was kind of interesting. I didn’t realize Pompeii was a 3 h drive south of Rome, not far from Naples. Like all road trips, you have to stop.

If it was up to me, all road side gas stations will have gourmet panini.

And provide a comfortable cafe sans a tacky fast food environment.

Yet, you can still buy limoncello in an Italy-shaped bottle stylized in stiletto boot.

Limoncello. A postmeal lemon-based liqueur. Right before going to the ruins of Pompeii, we had lunch. Our meal included a complimentary soda, beer, or wine. I decided to pay extra to add the limoncello. You know, when in Rome—or ~150 mi/240 km near it—do as they do.

My initial first impression was liquid summer. After all, the color matches the glorious sun over the Bay of Naples. Next, an aroma of freshly peeled zest, followed by the perfect lemon drop hard candy sensation…

…UNTIL the unholy extra strength FLOOR CLEANER flavor overcomes the delightful citrus taste you just had! Who in God’s Creation thinks Lysol is fit for human consumption???!!!

I don’t know. Maybe it’s an acquired taste? It turned OK once I cut it with orange Fanta.

One more stop. This time to a cameo shop and art gallery. Sure. I guess there’s a kickback deal worked out with the tour company to bring their guests to the very fine purveyor of handcrafted jewelry, Cellini Gallery Cameos & Corals Their work is done by hand from a conch shell using only the finest, most painstaking techniques. (No, I’m getting nothing from that plug 😜).

What was interesting was browsing their gallery. Some really unusual pieces from the empire. 

Here are examples of the Roman steampunk period.

And then this painting. There must be a story. Insert your own joke. (No credit if it begins with, “Is that a sword or are you…”)

Finally, we get to Pompeii. 

One thing that is surprising is that it is elevated from the surrounding land since most of it occupies a plateau.

Next, it is bigger than I expected. Its highest population was estimated to be about 11,500 residents based on housing units. 

There was a sporting arena and an amphitheater*. Definitely not a podunk town. 

*Confession: I didn’t realize it had both, so when I saw graduated seating rows, I thought  I was near the amphitheater, but I was on the other end of town, where the arena was. Kind of disorienting.

Can you blame me? Once you’ve seen one street in Pompeii, you’ve pretty much seen them all.

Mabel’s photo was taken at several different points. Worst directions to give in Pompeii? “It’s at the corner with the grey stone road and the brick walls with no roof.”

Let’s get back to how big it is. It is about 3.5 NYC Central Parks. If one attempted to walk every street…they must really be bored. Really? 5, 6, 8 h on these streets and you’re asking for a twisted ankle.

You know what else is like NYC? The unearthed pizzeria in the middle of town. Seriously. No, it wasn’t really unearthed, but pizza snobs would like to bury it.

Ancient punishment for ordering pineapple on a pizza?

And woe to those asking for ranch dressing.